The Relational Mission

Over the years, there have been a myriad of programs, books, and seminars on small group leadership. Most of them focus on practical techniques for how to do small groups in the “right” way. They address questions like:  How to lead a group discussion. How to facilitate an icebreaker. How to grow your group? How to lead worship in the group?  While understanding these techniques of group leadership is important, I found that doing these techniques well does not make for great groups. At best, you will get good group meetings. Leading a group by following the right techniques is a bit like trying to love your spouse because you follow a set of rules for a good marriage. It will leave you wondering why it's not working when you are doing what all the books tell you to do. The foundation for leading a group well lies in the end that you imagine. If all you want is a good group meeting, then follow the techniques. But if you want a group that “lives in love,” that li...

I have many fond memories of the church of my childhood, Foote Baptist Church, located in McKinney, Texas, in what was then a rural setting north of Dallas about 30 miles. One of the most significant memories was the altar call, the time at the end of the three weekly services when the pastor would extend an invitation to make decision for Christ. This decision time was the culmination of the entire service. It was a call to walk the aisle and make a public demonstration that a person was “getting saved.” Later, I was a part of a charismatic church in Houston. At the end of our services, we too emphasized an altar call, though the invitation was not as focused on people making decisions for salvation as much as making decisions to come and get a touch from God’s presence. However, both focused on the importance of making a decision. This practice of making a decision has been shaped historically by the revivalist experiences of the American church. The first and second Great Awaken...

Group strategies abound. Some refer to them as small group, others as missional communities. There are a lot of right ways to do groups. Some will argue about where they should or should not meet. Others talk focus on things like when they should meet, whether they should be mixed gender to gender specific, whether they should target a specific demographic or be geographically based, whether they should be closed or open, whether they should be long-term groups or short-term groups and whether they should study the sermon or choose their own topics. Should the oversight system be flat or a pyramid? Should the leadership system be based on the advice of Jethro to Moses in Exodus 18 or upon Jesus' strategy of choosing the twelve? And there is quite a bit of discussion about whether small groups of 8-15 or mid-sized groups of 20-50 are preferable. We could talk for hours about the various nuances and distinctions between strategies. Discussions around all of these i...

Dear friends, let us love one another, for love comes from God. Everyone who loves has been born of God and knows God. Whoever does not love does not know God, because God is love. —1 John 4:7-8 How would you describe God if a friend asked you to do so? What words would you use to explain what God is like? Well actually the words at your disposal comprise a very long list. Let's consider a few. First, the classic attributes of God that theologians have analyzed for centuries provide some guidance. They include such smart-sounding words as: • Eternal (God has no beginning or end; He has always existed • Transcendent (God is above and beyond the limits of our world • Omnipotent (God is all-powerful • Omniscient (God is all-knowing • Omni-present (God’s is present everywhere • Holy (God is absolutely unique and perfect) Or we can use some words that are a little more popular, and say that God is: good, trustworthy, generous, faithful, glorious, worthy, beautiful, ...

Christ does not call us to follow him so that we can triumph or so that we can rule in a visible way. Jesus called us to his way of life, a way that looks like the cross. If our aim is to rule or to succeed or even to have an impact on society, we will be tempted and most likely succumb to the temptation to be violent "in the name of Jesus." If we seek to make the kingdom visible, we inevitably do so on the terms set up by the world, thereby justifying the Gospel according the rules foreign to the Kingdom. Jacques Ellul put it this way: "Christ's lordship ... is universal but hidden. It is radical by not expressed. Instituted, it is not institutional. Royal, it is also mediate. Today, it is 'suspended.' ... He does not cease to be servant because he has been exalted by the Father above every name or power. ... This is the lordship of love. Hence it does not use force. It can be exercised only in a mutuality of love. It is in no sense authoritarian. The Lord i...

Thirteen men lounged around a table, ready to eat dinner. Then one stood, removed his outer clothing and wrapped a towel around his waist. While the other twelve mumbled conversation between bites, he walked to a corner of the room and filled a basin with water. He first wiped James’ feet. Matthew was next and squirmed like a 5-year-old. The next three sat in silence. Peter broke the stillness. “Lord, are you going to wash my feet? … No, you shall never wash my feet." When I meditate on the story of Jesus washing the feet of the disciples in John 13, I sit in awe and wonder. Awe at the humiliation of Jesus washing filthy feet. Wonder because I don’t get it. Then I read the punch line: “Now that you know these things, you will be blessed if you do them.” Jesus commanded us to wash one another’s feet. Yet, below the surface, this command lacks meaning. Do we institute a church ritual of foot washing? But I don’t wear sandals. I walk little. Sidewalks and carpet protect me f...

When I first started teaching seminars on small groups in the early 1990s, we put a heavy emphasis on multiplication of groups. The goal was to grow the group to 12-15 people and then multiply it into two groups. In many ways, this made a lot of sense. The logic goes this way: God wants all people to be saved. The most effective way to reach people is through relationships. Groups are founded upon relationships. As groups relate to people who don't know Christ, they will be exposed to the life and message of the Gospel and be drawn to it. Then they will be added to the group. The group will grow. When the group grows, multiplication will be a natural outcome. So we focused our language on the importance of multiplication, thinking that if we emphasized this outcome that it would motivate people to relate to and reach people who don't know Christ. The result, though, actually worked against our desire for multiplication. We communicated the goal of multiplication by u...